Poor Wilko. Things have gone downhill fast for the good-natured larrikin, from top of the world (or top 5) the last two seasons, to finding himself on the critically endangered list in 2018. It’s scary territory for a guy who’s earned a cult following by ripping hard and having a good time, but it’s his handling of the next chapter that’ll most likely decide his legacy.
It looks like he’s got three options.
The first and most fanciful is for him to shake off his early-round exits and go on an absolute tear through the last leg of the season. A win and couple of quarter-finals should see him scramble up the ratings enough to avoid the cocked rifles awaiting those outside the 22. And he’s got it in him. Three wins and a pair of runner-up finishes in two years attest to that. But the problem is, France, Portugal and Pipe have never been his areas, and no one who watched him surf Kelly’s Ranch would consider him anything but a long shot of taking out inaugural honours there. Besides, his confidence looks shot. 2018 just hasn’t been his year. So while this option is the best possible outcome, and while we’ll be rooting for him with a beer in hand from here on in, the truth is you’d be a brave soul to put any kind of faith in it coming off.
The second option is he falls off tour, restocks his shit-wave quiver, and jumps back on the grind. Career suicide, most likely. Look at his campaign at Huntington. Taken down like a wounded zebra first heat. If the Dream Tour is the bountiful jungle where the big cats feast, the QS is the adjacent wasteland where hyenas piss on the dead grass and trample all over each other at the slightest sniff of blood. And Wilko’s never been a lion. Or a hyena. He’s been brave and lucky and wild and dazzling, but a year or two among the hungry and the desperate would see him fade into sponsorless, forgotten obscurity. And no one wants to see that. It’d be a shame to lose one of surfing’s most smiled-about characters.
Which leads to Wilko’s last option, and the one that’d probably suit him best if the earlier miracle doesn’t come true: embrace the things that’ve made him popular and give it to his fans. Remember the colourful, offbeat character who wore funny wetsuits and took the piss out of himself with rollerblades and perms? Remember the guy who finally realised how good he surfed and smoked the world’s best twice in a row back in 2016? Combine the two and keep the camera trained. Strike the right flavour with the music and the editing. Imagine Wilko on The Search with Mick and Mase. Imagine that backhand roaming the globe for lips to belt and a whole lot of fun to go with it. We’d watch that. We’d probably even enjoy it.
What happens next is entirely up to Wilko.
Fingers crossed he kills it.
